Wrestlemania 35 Recap - Christmas in April

Look, there's been a lot of wrestling this weekend, and we've still got more coming, so I'm not going to get too much into each match from the Wrestlemania card but more importantly, each match result and the feelings that were felt. So let's just go ahead and dig right in!

First up was the Cruiserweight Championship where we had Tony Nese take on champ Buddy Murphy. As I've stated before, since Mustafa Ali left, I've not been watching 205 Live really at all, and the only times I've seen any matches have been on main roster PPV's. And this match is kind of indicative why I haven't been watching it a lot. There's a title at stake, and I didn't really care. 205 Live is the showcase for the flippy guys. I know it's nice to have technical wrestlers to face off against the flippy guys, but to have a match that's supposed to shine a light on a division that is supposed to be super fast-paces and "the most exciting hour on television", this was not it. Not that this was a bad match, but I just didn't really feel much excitement for it. I'm glad for Nese winning but I have no idea what he'll bring to the show as champ, so... it was a good match, but I don't think many people cared much about it and I don't think it'll drive new audience members.

Then we had the Uterus Cup Women's Battle Royal. I was scrolling through Twitter at the end of this match after Carmella had won, and I was shocked at how angry some people were that Sarah Logan or Asuka or the returning Ember Moon didn't win. But the thing is, Battle Royals are a goof. There have been absolutely zero winners of any of the Battle Royals that ended up getting a significant push after their win. Sure I would have liked to see Ember come back and win. Asuka winning would have felt too much like a consolation prize. And Sarah Logan winning would have just felt... odd. So this was a good moment for Mella, but it's not something that's going to bring her back into the spotlight.

Then we got the match that really made a lot of the smarks angry and that was the Raw Tag Team Championship match between Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder vs champs The Revival. Personally, I loved seeing Hawkins and Ryder get their first wins in forever on The Grandest Stage of Them All, and I know that the match was announced off TV and so on and so forth, and it seems like they buried The Revival, but as the good people over at the great Tights and Fights podcast (which if you haven't listened to yet, you can find here) say, Wrestlemania is "Ice Cream Christmas", meaning this is where you get all the fun stuff and the big moments. This was one of the many examples of how we got a true Ice Cream Christmas. I loved this match, and I loved having Hawkins and Ryder get the belts. They'll lose them in a few weeks and a maximum of two PPV's, but at least they had this moment.

Then we got the Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal, and this was a goof as well, and you know it's going to be a goof when you have SNL Weekend Update correspondents Michael Che and Colin Jost in there. And since the story between them and Braun Strowman was the only story that the match was telling, you knew that this was going to be Braun's win. There are a lot of rumors about Braun's backstage heat with management and that's why he's been reduced from the most over guy on the Raw roster a year ago into a mostly comedic character, but those are still just rumors. Still, it was nice to see Luke Harper return, although that bump that Ali took off the edge of the table looked bad. I hope he's okay!

And then the main show started with host Alexa Bliss who brought out Hulk Fucking Hogan. I do not understand why, knowing what we all know about the guy, he gets these huge pops. He said it, he gave a half-hearted apology about it and that's supposed to make us feel like we should totally forget about it? Nah. I know WWE fans have this Pavlovian Dog response to Hogan, but it's time to start making that dude feel unwelcome. However, I did like how this introduction led into the first match of the night.

To the shock and surprise of everyone, the first match on the main card was the Universal Championship between Seth Rollins vs champ Brock Lesnar. When Paul Heyman came out and interrupted the festivities of the opening by saying that, since his client was not going to be on last, he wanted to finish his fight, get paid and go to Las Vegas where he knows he'll be treated with respect, and that was the most meta thing that happened maybe in the entirety of Lesnar's WWE career. In fairness to Lesnar, he did everything that he needed to do in this match. During his pre-match savaging of Rollins, he made himself look like a maniac and Rollins look like the heavy underdog. But thanks to a ref bump, Rollins was able to hit the nut shot early on, and hit him with the Stomp three times in a row to get the pin and finally have a full-time Universal Champion (at least, since Roman had to relinquish). This was literally all the match needed to be, and it made me very very happy. We can say bye-bye to Lesnar for a while (hopefully) and it cast Seth as the top guy on Monday nights, particularly with that swinging of the title above his head after the match. Good stuff.

Next up was the "Smackdown Supremacy" match between A.J. Styles and Randy Orton. I was once again shocked that they put this match on so early. And this was the best Randy Orton I've ever seen (bearing in mind that I've only been watching full-time since 2015). The match was very well-booked and it was really exciting to watch considering you didn't know who was going to go over: the indie guy or the WWE lifer. But it turned out to be the indie guy, and perhaps this was a testament to how much the indie guys are changing WWE as a whole. But perhaps the best part of this match was a tweet I read as this match was starting that said "Fox News Presents...." (credit to Danielle Radford of Tights and Fights and Screen Junkies).

Then came the Fatal 4-Way for the Smackdown Tag Team Championship between Aleister Black and Ricochet, The Bar, Shinsuke Nakamura and Rusev, and The Usos. This was one of those matches that I felt they could book any way they wanted and I'd be okay with the outcome, but my preferred outcome was The Usos and that's exactly what I got. They're an amazing tag team, and unlike all the other teams, they weren't some kind of ad hoc team that was created because Vince didn't know how to book them as singles competitors. I'm still hoping that since Black and Ricochet are now pretty much officially part of the main roster that they split them up and make them singles competitors. They probably won't off the bat, but that's definitely what should happen. Anyway, I'm really glad Uce retained.

Then we got the Falls Count Anywhere grudge match between Shane McMahon and The Miz. This was a match that I felt overstayed its welcome a little too much, but they had to find something tall that these guys could fall off of. And despite how it turned out, I still think that the booking was pretty solid to have Shane pick up the accidental win. It was fucking goofy as all hell to see Mr. Miz get in the ring and try to square up against Shane, but that was part of the story being told. More than anything, I felt bad for the live crowd because they couldn't see much of the action unless they were staring at the Tron. But that's live WWE for you. It also gives them impetus to keep the feud alive and also to still keep Shane doing his "Best in the World" shtick. It was a good story being told, and it will continue.

Then came the Women's Tag Team Championship match between Nia Jax and Tamina, The IIconics, Natalya and Beth Phoenix, and champs Boss 'N Hug Connection. This match was a lot of fun. It never felt sluggish, and they made my dreams come true once again as The IIconics stole the win from Beth and Nattie. To see Billie and Peyton go over at Mania was just so goddamn fun and how they tagged their way in and... oh, it was just so fucking great. I loved this match.

And then we got, what I think we can all agree on, the show-stealer of the night (which is probably why this was the mid-show match) and that was the WWE Championship match between Kofi Kingston and champ Daniel Bryan. I know that the suspicion was heavy early on when Big E brought out a package for Kofi to open up after the match and that being some kind of indication that E was going to turn on Kofi. I didn't believe it for a second, because if Kofi ended up winning this match, there was no way they were going to spoil that. This was the only match on the card that felt like an NXT TakeOver match. A series of false finishes and high drama and incredible in-ring storytelling made this match truly special. Who would have guessed after the Rumble that Kofi Kingston was going to be the hottest male babyface in the company? This was lightning in a bottle and it was incredibly smart of Vince to actually see his way to capitalizing on that. And the outcome of the match felt historic because the competitors made the match feel historic. And Kofi celebrating with the old belt and his kids was just tremendous. This was maybe the best Mania match I've ever seen.

Then we got the weirdest match of the night and that was the United States Championship match between Rey Mysterio vs champ Samoa Joe. The only conclusion that I can draw from this squash was not so much because they wanted to make Joe look super-dominant, but that Rey was most likely still hurt. Bell to bell, I don't know if this match even went three minutes, but at least it gave me the outcome I was looking for. I felt bad for Rey but if he was indeed still not 100%, I'd rather they put Joe over quickly and give Rey time to heal. The dude's 44. Let him get some rest so he can come in and have more spectacular matches before he can't anymore.

Then came what I refer to as the "Tall, Dark and Handsome" Grudge Match between Roman Reigns and Drew McIntyre. I could tell that not only was the crowd kind of out of it after the confusion created by the previous match, but everyone knew that Roman was going over. After his comeback from his leukemia treatments, it was just the right call. Sure the match didn't feel particularly special, but it was a solid match from two extremely solid in-ring competitors, and I'm sure that Roman is going to start to eat some boos pretty soon, if not later tonight. I'm hoping they have a rematch at MITB or something because it would give Drew some of that credibility that he deserves, and it can give him the bragging rights of defeating all the members of The Shield.

Then we had a insanely fun segment with Elias playing with Elias as well as Elias. This was only made better by the swerve of John Cena coming out not as the "Hustle, Loyalty, Respect" version of John Cena but rather the "Doctor of Thuganomics" John Cena. First of all, it gave him the opportunity to wear a cap so he could hide his hair, and it gave him the chance to let everyone go back 17 years and feel like kids again. It was just really fun.

Then came the Legends match of the evening between Triple H and Batista in the No Holds Barred/Career vs Career match. It was really fun to see Batista again, and the match had some really fun and crazy spots. There was maybe a little too much huffing and puffing, but these guys are in or nearing their fifties, so it was bound to get a little sluggish. But it served its purpose and gave Batista the sendoff he must have wanted. Now, bring on AVENGERS: ENDGAME.

Then came the match we all knew was going to be depressing and that was Kurt Angle's Farewell Match against Baron Corbin. Look, it happened and it's over. Did Kurt deserve better? Of course. But we all know that WWE loves to send their performers out on their shields, so this was absolutely the predicted outcome. It's only going to serve to make Corbin more obnoxious, and that's a good way for him to keep up his heat, but that can't be something that he can continue to dine out on for too long. I know that his shtick might be starting to feel stale anyway, but I'm still enjoying it, and that's something that I still am not 100% sure that I understand. But Kurt got to walk away and have his feel-good moment regardless of the loss, so it was a win-win for him anyway.

Then came the Intercontinental Championship match between Finn Balor and champ Bobby Lashley, or The Demon vs Bill Bixby right before he turned into The Hulk. I was shocked that they put this match on second to last, but the pop was worth it. The Demon's entrance was insane and awesome and everything I wanted, and I could watch it on a loop for an hour and never get tired of it. The Manager was experiencing heart palpitations during that entrance, and to be honest, so was I. This was the kind of entrance that made straight men really question their sexuality. The match was quick and Balor was pulling out stuff I've never seen him do. A fucking powerbomb to Lashley? Holy shit. It was a short and indelibly sweet affair, and I loved it.

And finally, we had our main event for the Raw and Smackdown Women's Championships Winner Takes All between Becky Lynch, Smackdown Women's champ Charlotte Flair and Raw Women's champ Ronda Rousey. I knew going into this night that there were only two matches that WWE had to get right: the first was Kofi vs Daniel and the second was this one. If the match had finished any other way than Becky getting the win, the crowd would have revolted and torn MetLife Stadium to the foundation. But the pre-match speculation ran rampant on Twitter because Vince let Seth and Kofi win, so he must screw up one of the big bookings, right? Well, he didn't. And look, I could go on for several minutes about how I wanted the finish to be booked, but the fact remained that, at the end of the night, Becky Lynch stood tall with both the Raw and Smackdown Women's titles. We could also go on for several minutes about what this means for the Women's division having a single champion and what kinds of changes might occur going forward. We're going to have to wait and see, but I don't think we're going to be waiting for too long since it's more than likely that The Man will be opening up Raw After Mania.

I know that I've only been watching since 2015 and my first Mania was 32, so this is only the fourth I've seen from beginning to end. I've seen multiple matches from different Manias thanks to the network, but this, for me, was absolutely the best Mania I've ever seen. It had one truly superb match, and there wasn't a single win that didn't make me angry. I know that Wrestlemania is generally graded on a curve, but this was just fantastic. Everything I really wanted to happen, happened this weekend. Johnny Gargano is the NXT Champion. Finn Balor is Intercontinental Champion. Samoa Joe is United States Champion. The IIconics are the Women's Tag Team Champions. Seth Rollins is the Universal Champion. Kofi Kingston is the WWE Champion. Becky Lynch is Becky Two-Belts.

It doesn't get much better than that.

Well, that's it for this recap of Wrestlemania XXXV! Come back again this week for the standard recaps of Raw and Smackdown Live as well as NXT!

Until next time, kids...

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