This Week in Raw and Smackdown New Year's Week 2019!

So two weeks ago on Raw, we had the McMahons (Triple H is apparently an honorary McMahon) come out at the top of the show and declare that things were going to change, and then they did a show that felt exactly like every show prior. Last week on Raw, though, there was at least one significant announcement and that was of the Women's Tag division (even though it's still not yet implemented and we have no idea how exactly this is going to work as far as who the competitors will be or if it will be show-branded or cross-promotional). But last week was also Christmas and it was all about the fans, so they otherwise stuck to the status quo.

This week, things started to feel like they were changing. If Raw keeps putting in these incremental changes instead of just hitting the Reboot button, they might be doing the smart thing. 

The show started surprisingly enough with the steel cage match between Dolph Ziggler and Drew McIntyre. This felt like the kind of match they would want to put on last so they could save the big attraction match for last, but instead, these two went first, and man, did they put on a hell of a match. It was brutal, Drew and Dolph gave some great character moments, and it finally feels like they can put this rivalry to bed after Drew came out on top, delivering two Claymores to end the match and then cut a promo how he was "king of the Raw jungle" (which just didn't really feel right, but I got his point), and proceeded to fuck up Dolph some more. He came out looking like a monster, and that's the kind of momentum push that Drew needed to end the year on. 

Then we had Seth come out to deliver an impassioned promo about how he wanted to invoke his rematch clause against Dean right then and there. But Hunter came out, and the two of them stood nose to nose and Trips declared (and rightly so) that there are going to be no more automatic title rematches for the loser and if they want it, they have to earn it. This is the kind of change we actually want, because it creates more storytelling opportunities. And it was a fire promo from the both of them, and it didn't immediately cast HHH as the heel authority figure, but rather as an agent of change. Furthermore, it helped further Seth's character as he looks to transition back into a more "ruthless" version of himself that takes no prisoners and gives no fucks. Personally, I don't know if that's a good thing for Seth's character, but at least it's a place to go for him. Then Shane came out (I honestly don't know why Shane was there, unless it was just to reinforce the idea that the McMahons are in charge of everything and there's no more GM's or Commissioners) and said they were going to do a "Fresh Start" battle royal to determine who was going to be Dean's challenger for the belt that night and that match will start right...

...Now let's dive into the IC Title Contender Battle Royal. If you weren't secretly hoping that Curt Hawkins or Zack Ryder were going to come out on top, I don't think you have a beating heart in your chest. It was Ryder's lone appearance on Raw the whole goddamn year, and Curt, after having his record-breaking losing streak, it really felt like either one of them could get a really fun night battling for a title. But at the end, it was Apollo Crews standing tall after eliminating, I believe, a total of 9 other participants and his final opponent Baron Corbin, who got the boos for eliminating Finn Balor who also had a really strong showing (perhaps indicating a good showing for the Rumble... fingers crossed), as well as eliminating Ryder and Hawkins. So we had a title match between Dean Ambrose and Apollo Crews. I can dig it, but it's not like there was a fucking chance in hell that he was going to win. I like Crews a lot as a physical performer, but he's such a nothing personality other than the "I'm just happy to be here" vibe I've gotten from him since his call-up, and it's likely that he's going to fade into the background again immediately following this match. 

Then we got another silly promo from Corbin that this whole match was unfair and blah, blah, blah, cheap heat. Thankfully, Elias came out and sang a song about how Corbin sucks and that led to what will likely be their next respective rivalries as they got physical with one another.

And then we were back to "We've seen this match a dozen times" as The Boss & Hug Connection + Ember Moon went up against the Riott Squad in a 6-woman tag match where Bayley and Sasha went over again, cementing them as the team to beat for the eventual Women's Tag belts. It was another perfectly fine match and it served its purpose by furthering the idea of the Women's tag division in the audience's mind. 

I'm going to pause a moment to talk about Dean. This was the biggest, most horrifying heel turn in all of 2018, and it's just not working. First of all, Dean is making me laugh for all the wrong reasons. He's still letting his silliness come out in these backstage promos and while it's funny, it's not who this version of Dean Ambrose should ever be. He should be spitting nails, not bemusement. It's Booking 101, and I think that it's starting to become clear that Dean is not enjoying this at all, and that he has zero motivation to continue holding the title. He took it from Seth Rollins; that was his only explicit goal. He wants to be the "moral compass" of WWE (whatever the hell that means), but his goal should be fucking with Seth at every possible moment. Seth's in a match? Dean ends up costing him that match. Seth's cutting a promo? Dean attacks him. No words, no warning; just chaos. Dean's focus should be split between retaining the title and ruining Seth, but right now, it's just aimless and I hate it. Dean deserves better. 

And that takes us to Seth vs Bobby Lashley. Let's face it; no match with Bobby Lashley and Lio Rush involved is going to be a barn-burner. And as much fun as it is to watch Lio be all Spider-Man rolling and leaping around to avoid his attackers, he's totally unnecessary as the distraction machine. Have you seen Bobby Lashley? He looks like he can bench-press semis, but he needs a 160-pound motormouth causing distractions? Lashley should be booked like Brock Lesnar once was when he actually bothered to compete on Raw; a destruction machine. I've seen Heyman do distractions in the past but it's not every fucking match. But Lashley is being booked like The Miz, and it's just all wrong. That being said, the only reason for this match was showing a more dangerous version of Seth, and that aspect of it was played to perfection. He lost as he DQ'ed himself by hitting Lashley with a steel chair. And then he started teeing off on both Lashley and Rush with the chair, and finishing up standing tall as he gave Lio the stomp. This is more or less the kind of desperation I want to see from Rollins right now, because it sets up his redemption arc that much more clearly.

Then we had a 3-on-2 handicap match between Slater and Rhyno and Jinder and the Singh Brothers (or as I call it, the Bathroom Break match), where Jinder got the win on a cheap distraction that led to him hitting the Khallas on Rhyno. So, that... happened. 

Then came time for Dean vs Apollo for the IC title. This was just all around a very lackadaisical match and it bored me to tears. Sure it was fun to see Apollo get a title shot, but not only was this match a total slog, but had zero drama because there wasn't a fucking chance in hell that Crews would go over, and it hit me part of the way through that I think Dean might be working hurt. I couldn't see any other reason that he was moving and working so gingerly or slowly. Also, I never felt the hunger that Apollo should have for this match at any point, and I never felt that Dean was overpowering him with either strength, heel tactics (but there was an eye rake), or tactical thinking. Dean's stock couldn't be lower right now, but I'm sure that Vince will find a way. I still think that Vince is holding a grudge against Dean for talking shit about the booking in the ultra-depressing Mania 32 match between him and Lesnar on the Stone Cold podcast.

And thanks to a backstage segment earlier in the evening where Nia Jax and Tamina attacked Natalya, we got the main event with a tag match with Nattie partnering up with Ronda against Nia and Tamina. Again, Ronda continues to impress as she pulls new tricks out of her bag, and she can start to really carry matches. Her cross-body off the top rope to both Nia and Tamina wasn't picture-perfect, but we're watching her improve and try new things in real time. I can't overstate how surprising Ronda's rookie year has been. She started out looking impressive, and for a little while, it seemed like there wouldn't be much new that she would add to her repertoire, but she's really starting to feel more relaxed and comfortable, and that's been the key to her improvement is that she's learning by doing, rather than just come out for "important" matches. 

There are two more things that we need to talk about. First is Alexa Bliss's upcoming talk show segments. The dirt sheets don't have any definitive news on Alexa's status other than she's still not cleared to compete. She's working out in the PC, but nothing to indicate how serious her injury might very well be or how long she'll be out of competition. I'd hate to think that Alexa's in-ring career is in jeopardy, but at least they're trying to use her in different ways. Now we all know that Alexa is great on the mic, but her "Moment of Bliss" segments in the past have left a lot to be desired. It's more of the "Mean Girl" shit that I hate from a female heel, but by the same token, this segment, if it ends up being recurring, is at least a way she can remain in relevance on the show, and hopefully, it will lead to a surprise punch she ends up giving to someone once she's cleared. 

The other thing is something that I don't really even want to talk about, but it's hounded this superstar since they did this, and it needs to at least be addressed because it's been blown entirely out of proportion. On Monday morning, Seth Rollins tweeted about the "leaked" standup set that disgraced comedian Louis CK performed on Sunday night where CK made transphobic jokes as well as making fun of the Parkland school shooting survivors, and Seth's tweets were in defense of CK's brand of humor. Now, he's gotten a lot of heat on this online from the Twittersphere and on a few dirt sheets strictly condemning Seth's "support" for CK's jokes, where the claim is that Seth is somehow "normalizing" hate speech. Look, I hate Louis CK for what he's done and what he's become, and this is coming from someone who was a huge fan of his until all of the allegations of his sexual abuse started coming out and then later were confirmed by him. But I'm not sure that taking aim at Seth is the hill to die on here. He's a professional wrestler, not a Rhodes scholar. I'm not saying that in a demeaning way; a lot of wrestlers are extremely intelligent and some are well-educated but like most athletes, they're not always exceptionally thoughful. But if we're suddenly hating on Seth because he defended some really tasteless jokes, which have been there throughout CK's career (he did an entire bit about how if murder was legal, there'd be a lot of dead children and that was a few years prior to all the allegations coming to light when people were still loving him), then why are we not constantly giving shit to Ronda for the transphobic comments she's actually made over her career? Why aren't we constantly hating on Ronda for retweeting Sandy Hook truther conspiracy theories? Why aren't we casting all sorts of aspersions on A.J. Styles for being a flat-earther? Now, should Seth have gotten involved at all? Absolutely not; he should've known better and just stayed away from this. I'm not one for excusing bad behavior, but this isn't Seth behaving badly; this is Seth having a shitty sense of humor and being kind of a moron about it. I don't find Louis's "jokes" offensive necessarily because of what he said; I personally find them most offensive because they're horrifically unfunny and a further example of how low he's willing to punch in order to get a cheap laugh. So don't vilify Seth for finding them funny. If Seth were to tweet or say that he thinks transgender people are gross or not real women/men or that he thinks that the Parkland survivors are stupid or wrong or whatever, then please take him to task for that. You'd have my blessing. But if Seth feels these jokes are not particularly offensive, or in this case, that much more offensive than CK's past jokes (which was most of what Seth's point was), then just let this alone. We don't need thinkpieces from the dirt sheets or angry tweets from the IWC about how Seth is now essentially a "Nazi" now, as one Twitter user took valuable time out of their day to explain to me. And I don't want to turn this whole thing into a diatribe about the cesspool that social media can be, because I want to discuss fucking wrestling. 

Now, onto Smackdown...

I know that the mileage on The New Day can vary because they're both a comedy act and legit tag performers, and my wife is so sick of them, but sometimes, my wife just doesn't like fun things. I love New Day. The jokes don't always land, but when they do, they're laugh-out-loud moments. They're over with the kids because they're pretty much always fun, and they're over with the adults because they can fucking go. I know there are people that would like to see some of these guys on a singles run, but let's face it, I think that window has passed. They're too over as a tag team to really go off on their own. I think they were close to pulling the trigger on that back when they were feuding with the Wyatt's, but that's two years ago now. 

And then, we got Samoa Joe vs Jeff Hardy in the last open spot for a 5-way #1 contender's match at Daniel Bryan at the Rumble. Personally, I am so done with the Hardys. Matt would be a fun GM doing his wacky schtick, but I don't want to see Jeff continue to punish his body until he's unable to move when he's in his 50's. I know they made a big noise in TNA with the whole Broken Matt and Brother Nero thing, but I guess I've just never really cared because I didn't watch during the Attitude Era. But it's all academic because Joe gets the Coquina Clutch in for the win. So here comes another qualifying match that Joe will lose. This is something I go back to a lot, but one thing that Chris Jericho once said on his podcast is that heels don't need to win unless it positions them in a good feud. But this upcoming 5-way has two faces in Mustafa Ali and Rey Mysterio, one definitive heel in Randy Orton and someone who is now a tweener in A.J. Styles, whose babyface status is maybe in question after attacking Vince last week and his comments to him this week. But now, there's another definitive heel in Joe competing in this match. This is another thing where Smackdown as the "Land of Opportunity" doesn't make sense, unless these guys all qualified in house shows. 

And there's the long-overdue Rusev Day celebration! Yay! And we had Rusev playing against the whole foreign heel angle that Vince loves and started a "Rusev Day, USA!" chant! And it was great! At least, until it naturally got cut short by Nakamura. I gotta tell you; I'm not a huge fan of the babyface wife taking the bump in order to create further motivation for the husband to fight the heel. I'm not even a huge fan of the heel wife taking the bump as comeuppance, although Stephanie's spot into the table at Mania 33 was pretty awesome. 

And then we have Sonya Deville vs Naomi as Mandy Rose plays mindgames. This was actually a really solid match until we got all the stupid "Tee hee, I'm sexting with your husband!" bullshit from Mandy that causes Sonya to get the win off the distraction. This is such a really cheap-shit 90's Vince thing to do when you're trying to get the Women's division front and center. And speaking of the Women's division...

John Cena makes his "triumphant" return to SD, and when he asks for competition, instead of getting a man, he gets The Man. Becky is in the motherfucking house, ladies and gentlemen and she is here to kick ass and eat quinoa... and she's all out of quinoa. This leads to a tremendously fun mixed tag match with Cena and Becky vs Almas and Vega. Have I mentioned lately (or ever) how much I fucking love Zelina Vega? Every female manager should get down on their knees and worship Vega. She's tremendous on the mic, and she's pretty damn good in the ring too. Andrade would have gotten over in NXT on his own, but not nearly to the degree that partnering him with Zelina did. And since they've brought that same dynamic to SD, they should get them even more screen time. And Becky Lynch chucking John Cena out of the ring to get the win is the metaphor for what 2019 and beyond should be; getting the women their fucking due. Unlike most smarks, I really love John Cena. He's fun to watch, he can put on fantastic matches, and he's a genuinely good dude with a big heart, and now he's found himself in the "Legend" position of putting the younger generation over however they need to. I know that in the days of yore, a lot of people would complain about wrestlers on the verge of really getting over, but then getting fed to Cena. I think those days are gone. Cena is on his way to becoming a really solid character actor in Hollywood (not the star that Dwayne is, nor the legit actor that Dave Bautista is), and he could leave WWE at any time, and only come back when his presence is needed to get someone else over. I'm sure that at some point, they'll likely have him break the record for the WWE Championship, but I don't know that that's a record that ever has to be broken. I think 16-time champ should be the ultimate pinnacle of what a champ can be. Unless it's Becky, who should become the first 17-time champ at this rate.

And honestly, I'm loving the shit out of Miz trying to design matching ring gear for him and Shane. That's golden.

And Trips backstage with Asuka, putting her over. That's another thing that needs to happen more in 2019. And Becky's "mean" face is just so great.

And then there's the Fatal 5-Way. Oh, lordy. First, I am enjoying the more aggressive side of A.J. I didn't know if I would but it was definitely on display in this match. And OHMYGOD THAT URANAGE through the table. The Spanish Fly from the top rope. The dual 619s. The springboard 450 splash. This was a fucking awesome spot-fest where everyone got to do their power moves and it was really fun. Ironically, I thought this was Orton's best showing in a while. And they are coming up with new and different ways to showcase Ali's talents. If you watch Ali during the match, he's making a bunch of rookie moves, like getting over-excited, attacking the big guy first or trying for his finisher too soon. They are really booking Ali very well so far and it's been such a joy to behold. I was really hoping he'd win (for purely selfish reasons; I want to see him in a one-on-one match at the Rumble), but A.J. was the choice to go with here, and I'm totally okay with that. I want to see A.J. have a great match against Bryan at the Rumble, and I'm hoping they won't disappoint.

Other than those two matches, though, this was one of the few weeks in recent memory where Raw and Smackdown, quality-wise, felt pretty similar. Of course Smackdown had the distinct advantage of having two really terrific matches, but it also had matches that I either wasn't into, or actively hated the angle. So it kind of balances out for me. And this week's NXT is a best-of, so I don't think that there's going to be a review of it.

So I hope you enjoyed and I hope that you had a safe and happy new year, and here's to 2019 and may it be better than 2018!

Until next time, kids...